Starting with the kernel of its inception in 1969 (and its subsequently ongoing and unparalleled broadcast life thereafter) that began transfixing Australian audiences in 1971, The Children's Television Network (CTW) has long been bringing its hallmark brand of "edutainment" through the famed syndication, Sesame Street, to generations of viewers of all ages around the globe. The concrete and intangible values this public service has provided over the years is more than well documented, and the characters have become as familiar to countless viewers as some of their own family members. Who doesn't have the likes of an Oscar the Grouch or Kermit the Frog within their lineal brood? Who, of them selves, has not felt like Cookie Monster at a holiday banquet? And who among the television masses refuses to identify with emotional familiarities provided by the innocuity of Big Bird, and the melodramatic intimacy shared between Bert and Ernie? Yes, Bert and Ernie are perhaps the most relatively realistic reflection upon the nature of human affection in the modern broadcast era. They are the everyman's Batman and Robin disguised as The Odd Couple. They are an ironic character juxtaposition of Lenny and George from Steinbeck's prize-winning portrayal, Of Mice and Men. Defying conventional premises laid down by the prehistoric and homophobic Flintstones in the McCarthy Era of the Red Scare, Bert and Ernie have reinvented prior precedents for male relationships established during television's Golden Age by their primetime ancestors, such as The Honeymooners. They are sensitive men living together without shame, and based on the evidence collected, observed, and compared to known recurring symptoms of Cista Dublonis; common identifiers in their profiles would suggest strong indications that Bert and Ernie have also most likely been, and probably are to this day, latent Dublonis Carriers.

If we examine the characteristics of the two icons, we find that the first trait which jumps out at the casual observer is not the fact that they are yellow and orange respectively, or that linear equation derivatives drawn from the directional patterns of their apparel and applied as vertical and horizontal coordinates on a grid, curiously, run in counter-representational parabolic arcs to one another's psychosomatic case study profiles; no, the first trait we notice is not the fact that their chosen methods of delivery in humanizing their modes of interpersonal communication is a purposefully nuanced and transparently veiled cocktail of jaded sarcasm versus intentional obliviousness in order to simultaneously feature by subtly masking the underlying spirit of true intent, which is the expression of male sensitivity and availability, emotional vulnerability, and the feelings of frustration and loneliness that attach themselves to these attributes; no, while all these traits and many others stick out like a collective partridge in a petri dish or the sore thumb of a runway hitchhiker, but without question, upon initial examination, the most ostensibly obvious characteristic concerning Bert and Ernie that must be first and mostly acknowledged about them as control subjects, despite all of their humanistic qualities, is one that could be easily overlooked by many astute observers if they are too careless to recognize what is inside the proverbial box before thinking outside of it, and that is that they are, in fact, not human at all!

At first glance, the apparently mundane revelation that Bert and Ernie are not human may be of little import, no scientific surprise, and of merely peripheral relevance to their overall assessment as a control study by the untrained eye, but if we dig deeper, we find a startling trend emerges from ongoing tests and comparative analyses conducted between case histories since 1993 when the Dublon Incident first occurred. When approached from this angle, we find that the non-human quality of the subjects, Bert and Ernie (as well as others), combined with, but not limited to the aforementioned attributes in the preceding paragraph, add credence and momentum to the burgeoning breakthrough of two exciting scientific postulates:

# 1. Cista Dublonis may not only exist within a greater percentage of non-human entities than first thought, but may in fact be prevalent throughout the non-human inhabitants of Earth and the its universe beyond. Non-human inhabitants have long been suspected as "carrier links" in the chain of mystery surrounding Cista Dublonis, and the scope of how this evidence completely manifests itself has not as of yet been been determined, however, one conclusion from this postulate that may be drawn is that non-human entities that are known or suspected of having or carrying Cista Dublonis can be divided into two subsets: living and non-living non-human entities. Bert and Ernie, being muppets, would fall into the non-living category, while a documented case example like Kimo would fall under the umbrella of living non-human entities. It is not clear whether or not non-living, non-human entities, such as Bert and Ernie, are afforded a natural armor of protection by way of the fact they are not actually alive, but the continuing renewal of their longstanding syndication contracts with the Children's Television Network would indicate that they possess a certain quality of immunity, whereas living non-human entities like Kimo appear to have been more susceptible to the influential side effects associated with Cista Dublonis. Remember, there is no known documentation of case study subjects on record, living or non-living, that are known have ceased existing as a direct result of Cista Dublonis. Kimo ultimately expired from a depression-induced hunger strike. Bert and Ernie are believed to be continuing on with their everyday routines and careers with normalcy, although more research on this is hopefully forthcoming. With the advent of more recent high resolution renderings of photographic evidence through similar stills of digitally filtered images focusing on the subjects in question, compared to themselves, both before and after 1993,it could be asserted that among other symptoms the famous duo appear to endure; a possible shortening of the forward limbs could theoretically factor into their quality of (non) life, and the concealment of this symptom could have plausibly been compensated for over the course of these many years by simply having this phenomenon accounted for in the greater equation of their presentation to the general public, and subsequently "covered up" by their agents and handlers through the wonders of television editing and visual manipulation. Further investigation on this and other aspects of their connection to Cista Dublonis continues.

# 2. If Postulate # 1 proves to pass the test of time, and evidence indicates that it likely will, then the ceiling of possibilities regarding other non-living, non-human entities being Cista Dublonis carriers is nearly unlimited, and this greater subset of control subjects may possess a common, genetic key within the fabric of its otherly code to open the doors of perception at the gateway of understanding where the answers for a cure may rest. Other rumored non-human, non-living entities that are of note and thought to be possible Cista Dublonis carriers based on associated traits exhibited, include: Yoda, Smurfs, Snorks, Snarks, The TeleTubbies, Buddah, and several members of the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals. Obviously, there are difficulties in conducting valid control tests with non-human, non-living entities, but the visual evidence is often convincing enough to stand on its own merits. And what can we discern from entities such as these and others that project symptomatic characteristics of Cista Dublonis? What does it say about us as species, that we have quite possibly have incorporated this and other afflictions into the very fiber of naturally woven routines? That, we, as human beings, could, be collectively dealing with this little known epidemic by both conscious and subconscious means means vicariously through our creative output and expression as a society. How long has this gone on, and was 1993 the beginning or the apex of Cista Dublonis? An entirely new set of questions arise, and moreover when we consider the variables pertaining to non-human created, non-human, non-living entities. A whole new category! Aliens, Gods, and Paranormals. Certainly thought for food, and a new way of looking at an old shoe.

In summation, we may not yet possess all the advanced technology required to conclude beyond a shadow of a doubt that the likes of Bert and Ernie are irrefutably, latent Cista Dublonis carriers, but the evidence we do have shows great promise for putting more pieces together in the future and finally solving the ever evolving puzzle known as The Dublon Incident.

~ Dr. Duramater Penumbra, Researcher